Author Archive

Does your daddy know what you’re doing?

Does your daddy know what you're doing?

Jordan, a 5’8″, 128-pound, blue-eyed blonde from Kansas has a story.

“My parents have been swingers for a long time,” the 21-year-old beauty
explains. “I wanted to do Playboy, so I figured, Why not try porn?”

That makes no sense at all. Playboy isn’t porn. But the Loser doesn’t pick
up on that. Or maybe he does and, for a change, decides to be smart and say
nothing. But then he makes his usual mistake: He asks her what would happen
if her father found out.

Mercifully, the pre-fuck interview finally ends, and Jordan gets down on her knees and suck the Loser’s cock, and, as usual, he takes forever to get it up but finally does. The camera work in this scene is typical Loser-­off-the-set shots, views of his legs when we want to see her pussy, shots of his ass when he’s fucking her missionary-but you know what they say: You gotta take the bad with the good.

The bad: Loser.

The very good: Jordan. Her beautiful tits jiggle and jiggle while he fucks
her in the missionary position, and this view alone is enough to make us
want to forgive the Loser all of his faults.

Bottom line: Jordan cums. Loser cums. And so do we.

Does your daddy know what you're doing?

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She’s Alektra-fying!

She's Alektra-fying!

Alektra is great. She’s an exotic-looking, 21-year-old babe with a smokin’ body: 5’6″, 110 pounds, 34-24-34. She tells the Loser that she’s never done porn before, but the way she fucks in this scene, it’s clear she has big things ahead of her. Big cocks, big money.

The Loser, however, is another story. This is the best he’s ever gonna do, by far. He’s nervous. He can’t keep the camera steady during the pre-fuck interview. As an interviewer, he’s the worst, never knowing what to ask next, the opposite of a smooth talker. You’d think the girl, having never done a scene on camera before, would be the nervous one. And you’d be wrong.

When the sex starts, Alektra goes down to suck him off, pierced tongue and all, but Loser can’t get it up. This hot chick is blowing his sorry limp dick, trying her damnest, and he can’t sport wood. She takes his cock all the way into her mouth, deep-throating him like a pro. Maybe he’s distracted. We hear cars in the background. Is the Loser’s mother home?

Finally, he gets a hard-on and they start fucking. “What do you think so far?” he dares to ask her. She giggles. “It’s fun.” She giggles again. And again. Obviously, something about the Loser’s cock is tickling her funny bone.

But you know what? Even the Loser can’t ruin a scene when there’s a hot chick involved. Alektra looks right into one of the cameras while he’s deep-dicking her and moans loudly. Good stuff. She always seems to be aware of the camera, like she’s fucking those of us at home.

WARNING: This is very amateur stuff. But Alektra saves the day. And our hard-ons.

She's Alektra-fying!

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Allison Pierce goes deep

Allison Pierce goes deep

In the world of the Loser, all women are the same. They get asked the same questions. They get asked to do the same things before the fucking starts. “Does anybody know you’re here?” “Why are you here?” “Can you take your clothes off?”

So, here we have Allison Pierce, a 22-year-old from Texas. Five-feet-six, 115 pounds blue eyes, blonde hair. Smiles a lot. Giggles a lot. “I’m excited. Kinda nervous,” she says. Now, at this point, it might be nice to find out something about her. Maybe find out what makes her different from some of the Loser’s other girls. But the Loser is a total Loser. He can’t think on his feet, he can’t put a rap on the girl, he can’t have a conversation with her, he can’t treat her like a real human being. Good grief!

So, as usual, it’s left to the girl to save the scene, and Allison is up to the task. Deep-throating, eyes always on the camera. Allison‘s cock-sucking skills are a thing of beauty. The Loser doesn’t deserve her, especially when she licks his balls…eyes, again, looking directly into the camera. Nervous? She sure doesn’t seem nervous.

Neither does the Loser, who can’t help but keep it hard throughout the scene.

One thing we really love: When Allison is getting fucked doggy style, her hair gets messy and starts flying all over the place. In pro porn, they would’ve fixed her up, made it seem as if a girl’s hair stays perfect when she’s fucking. In amateur porn like this, the sex looks real because it is. We even get a nice view of the Loser’s cock penetrating her pussy from behind. The lighting is perfect, as is the focus and the camera angle.

Must have been a mistake.

Allison Pierce goes deep

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Ass-fucked by an asshole

Ass-fucked by an asshole

There are some things even the Loser can’t mess up. Like Erika, a 25-year-old blonde who was raised in Missouri, lives in New York City and ranks as the Loser’s naughtiest discovery yet.

Yeah, he tries to fuck it up, like by asking her if she has any reservations about what she’s about to do. But Erika smiles and says in her little girl’s voice, “I think it’s going to be fun. I’ve been thinking about it for a couple of years, and the more I think about it, the hornier I get.”

It’s immediately clear that Erika has no reservations about sucking and fucking in front of the camera. She gets right into the blow job, and Loser gets into it, too, getting hard instantly, which is a change for him. Erika attempts to deep-throat him while looking at the camera, then after one failure, succeeds and gags on his cock.

“That makes my nipples rock hard every time,” she says. She spits on his cock and works it with her hand. She licks and sucks his balls, then deep-throats him again.

Oh, sure, there are the usual Porn Loser fuck ups, like the bright camera lights we see in the background while she’s riding him. But Erika refuses to be distracted, and so do we. She’s sexy, horny, sloppy, so into it that the Loser can’t keep his camera steady.

“Every time I look at that camera, I think about how naughty I’m being,” she says.

“I think anal sex is the best sex,” she says.

Can the Loser’s cock find its way into Erika‘s ass? You’re gonna have to find out for yourself.

Ass-fucked by an asshole

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The Loser pours on the charm

The Loser pours on the charm

Our mothers used to tell us, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything.” The Loser’s mother should have told him, “If you don’t have anything to say, don’t say anything.” But the Loser was never told this. Or maybe he was and he didn’t listen.

So here’s the situation, fellas. Put yourself in the Loser’s shoes: You have a sexy, 22-year-old redhead sitting on your couch. She’s wearing a red, strapless top and a short, black skirt that’s slit all the way up her leg. She’s in your house because she wants to fuck. That’s the only reason she’s there. But she seems a little nervous. So what would you do?

Put her at ease? Try to calm her down? Make her laugh? Talk about sex? That’s what we would do.

But what does the Loser do? He asks Andi about her friends and relatives back home. He asks, “What’re you gonna do if they find out?”

In other words, the thing she’s probably most nervous about is the thing he decides to ask her about. Way to put the girl at ease, Loser.

But he doesn’t stop there.

“Nervous?” he asks her.

“A little,” Andi says.

“That’s okay,” Loser says. “So am I.”

At this point, it’s a miracle the scene ever gets shot, but give Andi, who’s a paramedic, all the credit. She uses her mouth to resuscitate what should be a disaster and works his cock nicely. Even when the phone rings–hasn’t the Loser ever heard of turning off the ringer while shooting a scene?–she keeps going until he drops his load on her face.

At least he’s good for something.

The Loser pours on the charm

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Porn, the final frontier

Porn, the final frontier

If you ever wondered what it would be like to see a girl fucking on a couch that’s floating through outer space, this scene is for you. The Loser screws up the lighting so badly in this scene that it looks like Aubrey is getting fucked into a black hole. We also get a good look at the Loser’s ass when he’s trying to cum on her face. Those of you who are into man-ass will love it.

Ah, but we should stop begin so negative, especially since this scene features a young, sexy, corn-fed Midwestern chick getting fucked on camera for the first time. Aubrey Lee is a 20-year-old, blue-eyed, strawberry blonde from Wisconsin, and the best thing about her is that she looks like the girl next door. In fact, as she tells us during the pre-fuck interview, the first time she’d ever been on a plane was when she flew out to California to fuck the Loser.

Perhaps she had dreams of big-screen glory. Perhaps she fantasized about getting the star treatment: a limo at the airport, hair and makeup by a professional stylist, a director who knew enough to turn off the camera when a dog started barking in the background.

But there was none of that for Aubrey Lee. Just some Loser fumbling with his camera while he tried to fuck her.

Successfully, we might add. It would be impossible not to get it up for Aubrey…who, by the way, has her kinky side. Give the Loser credit for this much: He finds hot chicks.

Porn, the final frontier

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Just keep sucking, baby.

Just keep sucking, baby.

The Loser proves that if you have a video camera, you can get the chicks. Otherwise, there’s no way a 19-year-old hottie like Amber (a 5′, 96-pound, blue-eyed blonde from Las Vegas, Nevada) would go anywhere near a guy like him. But there she is, sitting on his bed, ready to get down on her knees and suck his pathetic little cock when the call for action comes.

Yeah, the Loser’s cock is a pathetic little thing, and it looks tinier than ever, like a travel-sized weiner, when Amber starts sucking it. A trains horn sounds in the background. But Amber isn’t distracted, and apparently neither is the Loser. Or is Amber such a good cock sucker that she could get a dead man hard?

One of the best things the Loser does in this scene is put down his hand-held camera. Let’s face it, the Loser is never good at working it, anyway, and working without it gives him the chance to concentrate on the fucking. Amber is really into the sex, squatting on his cock, bouncing up and down. Ah, but then Loser makes the mistake of picking up the camera, and instead of seeing the fucking, we see Amber‘s face.

But, as fortune would have it, that’s not a bad thing because the look on Amber‘s face says, “Fuck me!” This points out one of the inadvertently good things about amateur porn. The pro guys would be focused on the cock going in and out of the pussy the whole time. But the Loser made a mistake, the mistake resulted in him focusing on her face, and that turned out to be good.

Amber fucks him harder. The camera rattles. She fucks him so hard that the lens is wandering all over. Amber‘s really loving her scene, loving the idea of fucking in front of a camera for all of us to watch.

The Loser is enjoying Amber, too, and he’d better. He’s never gonna get this piece of ass again.

Just keep sucking, baby.

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You Gotta Earn It

You Gotta Earn It

Remi doesn’t mind doing the work when it comes to fucking, but you’ve got to earn it first. How do you do that? Follow this guy’s example by fondling and sucking her perky tits till her nipples are hard as pencil erasers. Then lick her pussy like it’s the last ice cream cone on earth. After that, Remi will gladly get down on her knees to suck and jerk your dripping cock. When it’s time to fuck, she’ll get on top and do all the work with her pussy so you can lay back and enjoy the ride.

You Gotta Earn It

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Service That Goes Above And Beyond

Service That Goes Above And Beyond

Chloe works in retail because she enjoys helping her customers. If you need help with sizes or finding a pair of pants, she’s on it in a second. But her services go further than that. Does your cock need stroking? Chloe is more than happy to lend a helping hand. Want to get your dick wet? Her mouth and pussy will get the job done.

Service That Goes Above And Beyond

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What Chicks Are For

What Chicks Are For

When a girl shows up at your door, saying she’s there for the audition, then starts playing with that hula-hoop thingie, what’re you gonna do? Fuck her, right? Especially if the situation presents itself, as it does here with Ann, who’s 29 and from St. Louis, Missouri. Yeah, she looks younger. Cum helps maintain her youthful looks. “I do fuck a lot,” Ann told us. “I’m horny all the time, and when you’re a girl, you can pretty much get it whenever you want it.” Only if you’re a pretty girl. Or a marginally attractive girl. Or a girl with a working pussy. Let’s face it: We guys are horny toads. That’s what chicks like Ann are for.

What Chicks Are For

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Alexa loves to fuck. She’s in the wrong place.

Alexa loves to fuck. She's in the wrong place.

Like we’ve said before, some girls are so hot and sexy that not not even the Loser can fuck them up. Such is the case with Alexa, a 5’6″, 125 pound brunette from San Bernadino, California.

“Why are you here?” the Loser asks.

“I like to fuck,” she answers.

And the Loser says, “Well, this is the right place to be.”

Well, not exactly, but like we said, just keep the camera on Alexa, make sure the lighting is reasonably good (a challenge for the Loser, always), and keep the camera from shaking (another challenge) and there’s no way you can fuck things up with this girl.

She takes off her clothes. She’s wearing a white top with no bra. “Are you ready to suck some dick?” the Loser asks.

Hey, good question!

The action begins. Alexa looks right into the camera while she’s sucking dick deep. The Loser fucks up half the camera angles, but the other half save the scene. Alexa never stops moaning with pleasure, and we’d like to say that’s because the Loser is fucking her good, but we all know that’s not the reason. We know the reason. She said it earlier. “I like to fuck.”

Alexa loves to fuck. She's in the wrong place.

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Ass Play

Ass Play

This is Myah. She’s 18 years old. She’s from New York City. When the “Loser” asks her, she admits that she’s nervous.

But not so nervous that she won’t take it in the ass.

Yeah, that’s right, we said it, the ass. The “Loser” doesn’t delve into the anal cavity too often, but he’s lucky enough to this time. Now, be forewarned: Myah‘s ass is little. It looks like you could break it in half if you fucked it too hard. But it doesn’t break in half, and if the truth must be known, she seems to like it a lot better in her ass than in her pussy.

So, congratulations to the “Loser” for not only finding this hot piece of ass but also fucking her in the ass. We’re not much into giving compliments to the “Loser,” but the truth is the truth.

Ass Play

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Tender Tart

Tender Tart

You flattie lovers out there are gonna love this one. The girl’s name is Kylie Richards, she’s 20 years old and from Pasadena, California, and she has absolutely no tits at all. Yep, she’s nothing but nipple, and she’s cute as can be with a very pretty face and a perfect little ass. Where does the “Loser” find these girls? One thing you gotta say about this guy: He might not know what to do with the girls once he finds them, but he definitely knows how to find them.

Anyway, when this scene opens, Kylie seems very nervous. She’s jittery, as all first-timers should be, and the “Loser” does absolutely nothing to put her at ease. The thing we love about Kylie is that she’s so real. Her bra and panties are normal-girl bra and panties, not stripper/porn star bra and panties.

But once she gets down to fucking—once the “Loser’s” cock comes out—she proves that she’s not a normal girl. She has the makings of a star. She sucks his cock deep and lustily, and when the “Loser” sticks his dick in her, she moans loudly because she’s enjoying it. Before long, it seems as if Kylie has overcome her nerves, and she’s done it by doing what comes naturally. Or cums naturally. Whatever.

The “Loser” has found another winner.

Tender Tart

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Tri Sexual?

Tri Sexual?

“I think once I have the cock in my mouth I’ll be much better,” says Taitum Reed when the Loser asks her if she’s nervous. Now that’s the kind of answer we like to hear. Some people chew gum. Others eat to calm their nerves. Taitum sucks cock. Actually, she licks it first, teasing the Loser before taking his cock into her mouth, and you can just see the nervousness leaving her body.

Taitum is 22 years old and from San Francisco, California. She has brown hair, blue eyes, and enjoys traveling, shopping and writing. She likes to have sex in public and is looking forward to her first gang bang. We’re sure that can be arranged. Oh, and she’s bi. She likes men and women. She even seems to like the Loser. Does that make her tri?

You know, going to the Loser is like going to the doctor. He doesn’t ask the girls to do a slow, sexy strip. He doesn’t ask them to leave anything to the imagination. He just has them strip naked as quickly as possible so he can, as he says, “get down to business.” Is this hot? We don’t think so. Is it any way to treat a lady who wants to be a slut? We don’t think so. But if the Loser knew what we wanted, he’d be rich right now, right? And he isn’t. Believe us.

Tri Sexual?

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Taking One For The Team

Taking One For The Team

The highlight of this scene is when Kitana, a tall, thin 22-year-old from Troy, New York, laughs at the loser’s cock. We’d been waiting for that to happen for a long time, and here, it happens. But, first, some setup.

Kitana has long, black hair and a big tattoo on her back. She’s wearing sexy panties, but we hardly get to see them because the Loser doesn’t like to leave anything to the imagination and has her take it off right away. We get the feeling that Kitana is really into the tease (and probably spent a long time picking out those panties) and would have rather left them on because she knows how much guys love sexy panties. But the Loser, being a loser, has every girl do the exact same thing.

It’s when Kitana is naked that she laughs at the Loser for the first time. He asks her, “Are you ready to get down and funky,” which is language we haven’t heard in a long time. Yeah, she’s ready to get down and funky, and she’s standing there totally naked when he asks her if she wants to back out.

Are you kidding?

But she might be having second thoughts when she sees the Loser’s cock because that’s when she breaks out in laughter. Yeah, it’s a puny little thing, especially when it’s soft, and it’s likely that Kitana was expecting better. More, that is. After all, a chick gets into porn, she expects to get fucked by giant porn-stud cocks. Not this time, Kitana.

So, she gets down on her knees, controls her laughter and proceeds to take one for the team. That would be us. The team. Go, Kitana!

Taking One For The Team

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Vegas Honey

Vegas Honey

Ya gotta hand it to the Loser. He finds some good ones.

This time, we have Heather Anne, an 18-year-old brunette from Las Vegas who tells us, “I used to work at a strip club.” Say what? Used to when? She’s only 18, for goodness sakes!

After the Loser smartly decides not to take that line of questioning any further, Heather reveals that she stopped stripping because she couldn’t dance. But, as you’re about to see, she can definitely fuck.

Our favorite part of this video is when Heather is blowing the Loser’s cock and her hair starts getting in the way. She kindly asks, “Could you pull my hair back?” knowing that with her hair in the way, we can’t see the dick going in and out of her mouth. Obviously, Heather knows what she’s doing.

As cute, little pieces of ass go, Heather‘s right at the top of our list. Five-foot-three but long legs, 105 pounds, 34-24-32, tight little body, B-cup tits. Hey, she’s only 18. She’s in mint condition!

So, after the Loser reminds Heather that she should be nervous, and after Heather tells us that her father, of all people, knows what she’s doing, the sucking and fucking starts, and it’s definitely worth a jack.

And by the way, Heather Anne, honey? You don’t have to know how to dance to be a stripper.

Vegas Honey

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Little Sexy Lexi

Little Sexy Lexi

Lexi is a little one: five-feet, 106 pounds, 32-24-32, B-cup tits. She’s a dirty blonde, and we mean that literally and figuratively.

Lexi isn’t much of a talker. At first, she seems shy… reserved. But then she starts working on the Loser’s cock and makes slurping noises. And the harder and faster she sucks, the more noise she makes, and before long, she’s licking up and down his shaft and sucking even harder. You know how the Loser sometimes takes his time getting hard? Not this time. He’s hard in a hurry, and for good reason. Lexi simply doesn’t take “soft cock” for an answer. Slurp-slurp-gargle-gargle-slurp-lick-gargle. Very enjoyable.

The fucking in this scene is great. At least what you’re seeing of it is great. Unfortunately, more than half of the footage ended up on the cutting-room floor because of bad lightning and the Loser’s usual shaky camera work. Lexi gets her first pro dicking and the Loser cums on her face, but we’re here to tell you that as videography goes, this was anything but HD. Still, there’s enough here to get the job done.

Little Sexy Lexi

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Little Tease

Little Tease

Heather can be a real tease. The Loser asks her to take off her clothes. She takes off just her top.

“Keep going?” she asks.

Keep going. She takes off her pants. “Keep going?”

“Keep going, keep going!” the Loser begs.

Finally, she has all of her clothes off, and it’s an impressive sight. The Loser expresses actual excitement.

“You got the body. Are you ready to suck some dick?” he asks.

“Yes,” she says.

Then a moment of hesitation. “Yours?”

After she overcomes her initial disappointment-what did she expect, Sean Michaels to show up?” -Heather gives a spectacular BJ, deep-throating, gargling cock, sucking balls, spitting on the Loser’s dick, giving him the kind of blow job he’d only dreamed of. Listen, we’re going to say this right here: As of this moment, Heather is the BJ champion of PornLoser.com.

A few basic facts about Heather: 5’4″, 104 pounds, 32-22-32 from New York City. Blue eyes, long, blonde hair, obviously very experienced in the sack. A chick doesn’t suck cock like Heather does the first time.

Little Tease

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As Horny As They Cum

As Horny As They Cum

As “Porn Loser” girls go, Tori is as horny as they come. The amazing part is that she stays horny throughout the scene, even when the Loser is fucking her. Even when he has to interrupt her doggie-style pussy poking to adjust one of the cameras, leaving her without a cock in her cunt and us with, thankfully, a view of her ass, pussy and asshole, courtesy of a secondary camera.

Tori is 5’5″, 128 pounds of fun from Minnesota (she’s now living in Los Angeles). She has green eyes, brown hair, measures 34-28-36 and smiles and giggles a lot, especially when she’s talking about sex. We’ve rarely seen a girl this enthusiastic, especially prior to her first scene.

“I always have these crazy ideas about sex, and I masturbate like crazy,” she tells us. “I’m really sexually open.”

We find out how wild and crazy she is even before she goes down on the Loser’s cock. Even the way Tori takes off her top and skirt seems to scream, “Fuck me,” as she squats on the floor, as if she were waiting for the Loser to bring over his cock. He doesn’t, but she goes on with her striptease, doing more stripping than teasing.

“I want to make you real hard,” she says.

That’s easier said than done with the Loser, who doesn’t respond the way 99.9% of the hetero male world would as Tori proceeds to give him a great blow job: hands-free, deep into the mouth, making smacking noises when the cock leaves her mouth, asking,”Do you like that?” Licking and slurping up and down on his cock, making humming noises, licking his balls. Finally, the Loser responds, but just when she’s got some good wood to suck, he invites her to jump on top of his cock, something he never does.

“Do you like my pussy?” Tori asks.

The camera fuck-up happens a few minutes later, but by that point, we’re so turned-on by Tori that we forget who’s fucking her. Oh, yeah. The Loser. Ya had to remind us?

As Horny As They Cum

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The Loser Bags A Stunning Babe

The Loser Bags A Stunning Babe

A little over a minute into this video, Gem takes off her top and skirt, revealing a super-tight, super-curvy body in a black bra and sexy matching panties. At this point, a normal man would express some admiration for Gem–or as the Loser always refers to it, “what we’re working with here.” But not the Loser, who doesn’t say a word, leaving Gem to stand there awkwardly, waiting for some glimmer of approval. Finally, when Gem has all of her clothes off, the Loser says, “Awesome. Great body. Very hot.” But it seems like too little, too late, especially for a hot piece of ass like Gem.

A few basic facts about Gem. She’s from England. She’s 21 years old. This is her first scene. She’s 165 centimeters tall and weights 54 kilos. That’s 5’4”, 119 pounds for those of you in the United States side of the pond. She’s a little girl, but she apparently has a big mouth because she practically throats the Loser, which might not be saying much but is definitely saying something. A nice added touch is how Gem sucks the Loser’s rod through his boxers. This girl definitely has a future.

The Loser clearly has no future as a porn director or videographer, as this scene clearly proves. He sets back the art of P.O.V. Videography two-dozen years with some camera work that takes us right out of the action or too close to the action. But, as usual, there’s enough here to keep us jacking. The blow job scene. The way Gem looks at the camera. Her shaved pussy, which really deserves better. But, hey, this is amateur stuff, right? And if we wanted pro-amateur porn, there’s plenty of that out there. So, the Loser gets the job done, the girl gets laid and has a scene to add to her resume and we get off. So who’s complaining?

The Loser Bags A Stunning Babe

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